My kiddos have a church event that they are involved with every morning this week, so while they were keeping busy, my mom, Kolby, and I went to Star$'s cafe. My mom treated me to a yummy drink and was in line placing the order, while I stood rather close to the remaining table that had customers about ready to leave. It was the perfect table out of the way for Mister, and so I just was playing it cool while they packed up their things.
It was just barely after 10am when my phone rang with the area code 707. I was expecting the Canine Companions phone call, but I really thought it would come much later in the day. I ditched the waiting for the table, and took Kolby with me to the sidewalk where I could chat more in private.
Needless to say the phone call was nothing to celebrate over. I will fully admit I am disappointed that Haddie did not make a Pre-match this week. I know that not every puppy would match, because more Puppies than People are invited to Team Training. But I was hoping that Haddie would be one of the four paws to find her Forever Person.
After much conversation with my mom about the "What now's" and texting my very sweet friend to hear more encouragement before I drove to pick up my kiddos and share the news ... I am still an open book and will say that while I have moments of Hope, and moments when I am also very Sad.
While Canine Companions shared that Haddie will stay in Advanced Training and hopefully match in November, I received her July Advanced Training report just hours after the phone call and that too was not much to celebrate over. I am very worried that Haddie has had enough time in the kennel, and if her friends leave campus, and she remains with new dogs, and new everything to "start over" and "wait around" for November, that she will just decide "this is enough."
I can't say as though I blame her. It is enough. Right?! I know I signed up for this Roller Coaster, but can I get off now?!
Haddie's report was still very positive in all the right areas, but the words, "Showing signs of stress" were stated. That makes me very sad. Enough said.
Her positives were very positive, which certainly gives Hope that a match will be in her future. It all is determined at how long she has to wait, and how stressed she becomes during that time.
I am starting to really grasp holding strong to the fact that God knows exactly where Haddie needs to be, and for whatever reason, that next chapter can not happen just yet. While the wait and the excitement for the future is filled with many ups and downs, we must Trust that He really is in control of this entire situation.
This is tough, but doable.
Oh, what to say. While I have not made it "that far" with a puppy, I do understand much of your feelings already. Matthew 6:26 comes to mind. It talks about the birds of the air, and how our Father provides for them, and how much more he cares for you and I. But, He created them, and He cares about them. He created Haddie, and He cares about her too. He has had the perfect place picked out for her since before she arrived in your home. I know it is so, so hard to wait and see where that is, but I promise you it will be better than you can imagine. ((Hugs))
ReplyDeleteThank you. Hannah. Through tears I type...I am in my dark room, window open, listening to faint dog barks and chatting with God. I was thanking Him for loving Haddie more than I do, and loving her Forever Someone more than I will ever...and I was letting that thought soak in, when my phone buzzed. Peace fell over me as I instinctively grabbed the phone to see Only this message for me. Thank You for these God inspired word of truth. You have no idea the power and peace....thank you, Sweet Friend.
ReplyDeleteOh Linda.... I have talked to you throughout the day. You know my thoughts in words... And stickers. I love our plan and everything falls into place for a reason. My mom got Felice and she was there for 9 months. Felice just knew what to do. So will Haddie. She's a smart girl. Stay strong.
ReplyDeleteWhat Hannah said. It is such hard news to take - to wait - especially when so much hope and excitement is just part of the process. It's disappointing to be sure. But you're right, it's another lesson learned and His timing is perfect. It is a credit to you to accept the news with such grace, and get to look forward to a November trip to Santa Rosa! Best of luck to Haddie. (BTW - I hear the third semester kennels are quieter and more chilled - so hopefully that helps with her kennel stress not being near those silly freshmen! :D )
ReplyDeleteWe went through the same thing with our 1st pup, Ansel. He didn't make a match the 1st go round, but came back at the next TT and made the perfect match. You did a great job training Haddie and being given another chance at TT is a good thing!
ReplyDeleteThank you all so much. I am humbled and blown away at your support. A new day has started and I am truly at peace thanks to your pep talks and truths. Thanks for your friendship and caring. This is all going as planned and it feels good. Go Haddie Go!!!
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